Autism SUCKS! I have a lil genus on my hands who struggles everyday just to make a complete sentence. That sucks! Yet, I can hand him a book and he'll read it to me...better than my 4 year old. I have a lil sweetheart who has no concept of potty training, except if he goes in the potty, mommy will give him a popsicle. We go through a lot of pullups...and a hell of a lot of popsicles!! That sucks. I have an innocent 3 year old obsessed with cars, buses and trucks...big trucks! Our ride to school in the morning consist of talk about cars, buses and big trucks! But ask him what he did at school that day- and I get nothing! That sucks! I have a smart little toddler who is so locked into a routine, I do not have to walk him to his classroom. I can actually trust that he will find his way, more than I can trust that my 10 year old will remember to bring her math worksheet home. His robotic mind might seem amazing...but it sucks that anything out of routine makes it seem like he is new to the planet Earth!
What sucks even more is that he goes through his day with a smile not even knowing yet that Autism is like a black cloud over his head. Seeing your child suffer is tough, but having little control over it SUCKS. Of course, we have therapy...tons of therapy! Which sucks too. Who wants to have your child in therapy....indefinitely! Then there are the battles with insurance companies! They suck too! I do not know how many times I have said...."you raise a child with autism and then see if you have an attitude when you tell me NO to a service he needs to survive!!!" Insurance companies do not care...their representatives do not care. But I sure as hell make sure they get my perspective. Not one single representative I have talked to in the last 2 years get off the phone with me, without me telling them exactly what it is like to have autism in your world! Of course, I probably could tell them in a nicer tone...but nice or rude...neither gets me anywhere with them...so I opt for rude, as it is like my own little proverbial punching bag.
I guess with April (Autism Awareness month), the upcoming 5K/1mi run for autism I am hosting, along with the daily grind of dealing with autism....it has caught up to me. Autism sucks. I would have never asked for autism in my life, I would have never wanted to be an advocate for the cause. I use to joke when my first child was born, that I was going to save the world- if I could just find a babysitter, damn it. Now with 3 kids in tow, God has asked me to save the world...one day at a time, with one small task at a time, with a sweet innocent face looking back at me. When I graduated from high school I wanted to go into the Peace Corps. Coming from a military family, my mom quickly talked me out of it since she did not want to see her youngest daughter stationed in war torn countries. Ironically, that desire to help, aid, and advocate has come full circle. Who would have thought that I would be so focused on pushing awareness for a disorder that was unheard of just a decade ago.
Does my life suck?? In short no. I have a beautiful house, a wonderful career, a solid marriage, and wonderful kids I adore! Does autism suck? More than you can ever imagine.
My request today for those reading this...do me a small favor. Make it your goal today to tell 1 person about autism...or direct one person to the Team Teagan facebook page...or give one person who has a newly diagnosed child with autism my email. Awareness is like a domino effect...Autism is a huge mystery...be part of the team looking to solve this mystery that leaves families devastated, children isolated, and moms like me heartbroken at the task in front of them.
1 comment:
If you meet a Person who has Autism, dial direct, and ask questions. the answers you get will not be the ones that come from "Professionals."
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